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One evening over dinner, I began to joke, as I often had before, about writing an essay called “Men Explain Things to Me.” Every writer has a stable of ideas that never make it to the racetrack, and I’d been trotting this pony out recreationally every once in a while.My houseguest, the brilliant theorist and activist Marina Sitrin, insisted that I had to write it down because people like her younger sister Sam needed to read it.Young women needed to know that being belittled wasn’t the result of their own secret failings; it was the boring old gender wars.So lovely, immeasurably valuable Sam, this one always was for you in particular.It wanted to be written; it was restless for the racetrack; it galloped along once I sat down at the computer; and since Marina slept in later than me in those days, I served it for breakfast and sent it to Tom later that day. It still seems to get reposted more than just about anything I’ve written at Tom Dispatch.com, and prompted some very funny letters to this site.

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Last year’s Nobel Peace Prize went to women, two Liberians and a Yemeni, “for their non-violent struggle for the safety of women and for women’s rights to full participation in peace-building work.” Which is to say, that safety and full participation is only a goal.This is a struggle that takes place in war-torn nations, but also in the bedroom, the dining room, the classroom, the workplace, and the streets.And in newspapers, magazines, and television, where women are dramatically underrepresented.Even in the online gaming arena women face furious harassment and threats of assault simply for daring to participate. Real violence, the most extreme form of silencing and destroying rights, takes a far more dire toll in this country where domestic violence accounts for 30 percent of all homicides of women, annually creates about two million injuries, and prompts 18.5 million mental health care visits.It’s in Cairo’s Tahrir Square too, brutal gender violence where freedom and democracy had been claimed.Having the right to show up and speak are basic to survival, to dignity, and to liberty.

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